Personality Disorders

[tigersfan25]

Going through life, I've come across annoying people. Its nothing new to me, nor should it be new to anyone else on this message board.

With that said however, I am beginning to have some doubts about a member of my immediate family (luckily, not my wife) who has always caused trouble for surrounding members of my family. And while she has never been diagnosed, she has almost all the symptoms of a person who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

For example, whenever you disagree with this woman, she take it as an act of war, someone trying to control her life, and proceeds to insult and denigrate you to the point of absurdity.

Do any of you know of anybody that suffers from a personality disorder. And if you do, how do you deal with it?

[eastside billee]

Of course I don't know anyone who has this problem. What's wrong with you, anyway? Do you think I'm some kind of idiot? Are you insinuating that my family has some kind of flaw?

Just who the hell do you think you are?:classic:

[Mattingly70]

TF25, I have some limited experience with some mental disorders with people near me. FWIW, the only chance you have, IMHO, is if they recognize the problem and agree to get help. That is critical from what I've seen. IF they do ]admit a problem exists I would start with a general practianer and ask for a referral. In your situation I would talk to others who don't know this person. You might be surprised by how many people around you know someone who is getting therapy or has gotten it for similar problems. Good luclk. I hate typing on this computer (old laptop) and apologize for typos.

[tigersfan25]

Originally posted by Mattingly70
TF25, I have some limited experience with some mental disorders with people near me. FWIW, the only chance you have, IMHO, is if they recognize the problem and agree to get help. That is critical from what I've seen. IF they do ]admit a problem exists I would start with a general practianer and ask for a referral. In your situation I would talk to others who don't know this person. You might be surprised by how many people around you know someone who is getting therapy or has gotten it for similar problems. Good luclk. I hate typing on this computer (old laptop) and apologize for typos.

No problem on the computer.

Regarding this person, it is my aunt. She is an absolute terror to be around... and my both of my parents will not stand up to her. Whenever someone has the gall to disagree, its considered someone trying to "run her life"...

I would love to try an intervention of some sort on her, but once again, I don't think my parents, nor my younger brother or sister, would dare stand up to her. I just am not sure. I couldn't see anyone with a mental condition trying to fix it, precisely because of the state of denial that they are in.

I'm gonna try doing what you have suggested, perhaps ask a few people I work with about these types of issues, and see if I get any feedback. Heck, this is why I came here to ask... for all I know, somebody may have some info. I could use :classic:

[DetroitFolly]

How old is she? Is she in any kind of financial trouble? Is she at the age where care might become an issue?

A lot of people when they start getting older get worried about being put in a home...this is a typical reaction to that possibility. What they don't realize is, they are so annoying and mean, that even if the family didn't want to put them in a home, they start to consider it.

[smr-nj]

She sounds menopausal.

Stay away.
Far
Far
away.

If you can't do that, when she starts acting whacky, don't buy into it. Laugh out loud, and when she asks what you're laughing at, tell her "you're being ridiculous. Go get some Paxil, for crying out loud, and quit terrorizing this family".

That might work.

[Tigercub33]

TF25, I understand what you are going through. I agree with Mattingly in regards to teh fact that you BEST hope is that your Aunt recognizes she has a problem and is willing to take steps to get help or ask for help.

My family had problems with a relative and eventually had to get thsi relative committed (this personal made numerous threats upon my mother's life and was a certified nut). Unfortunatly, I feel that someone close to me has a life ahead of her similar to what my parents went through.

The best thing to try to do, IMO, is to try and remember your Aunt BEFORE she became this way, try and remember that she is not WILLFULLY acting this way, rather her illness is making her act in such a way.

Good luck with this, it truly is one of the greatest difficulties that any family can endure.

[tigersfan25]

Originally posted by DetroitFolly
How old is she? Is she in any kind of financial trouble? Is she at the age where care might become an issue?

A lot of people when they start getting older get worried about being put in a home...this is a typical reaction to that possibility. What they don't realize is, they are so annoying and mean, that even if the family didn't want to put them in a home, they start to consider it.

54 years old... I am not real aware of any financial trouble, although she is one to keep that kind of thing under wraps. Considering that I work in the finances field, it would help to know what she looks like for retirement.

I don't believe the home ever became a thought to my family. But she certainly is annoying enough. I try to avoid her, I've tried all I can to get along with this woman, and it just doesn't work. Case in point: I let her come and visit Las Vegas and stay with us for 5 days a couple of weeks ago... it ended with her running down me and my wife because we merely disagreed with her.

[rhino]

For Christmas have all the family members chip in and pay for a Dale Carnegie course.

[snoogit]

My sister is a lot like that. Unfortunately we havent figured out how to deal with it yet :silly:

[smr-nj]

Originally posted by tigersfan25
54 years old... I am not real aware of any financial trouble, although she is one to keep that kind of thing under wraps. Considering that I work in the finances field, it would help to know what she looks like for retirement.
I was NOT being facetious before.
54 yrs old is prime menopausal timeframe.
It makes some women a little more than nuts and "out there".... and if she had personality problems previous to this life changing time, menopause and it's corresponding hormonal nuttiness can exascerbate the situation.

I'm serious.
Confront her with the fact that she's being unreasonable, and suggest she talk to a doctor about it.
They do have drugs that can help (no matter what Tom Cruise thinks of them..... oy vey.)

[tigersfan25]

Originally posted by smr-nj
I was NOT being facetious before.
54 yrs old is prime menopausal timeframe.
It makes some women a little more than nuts and "out there".... and if she had personality problems previous to this life changing time, menopause and it's corresponding hormonal nuttiness can exascerbate the situation.

I'm serious.
Confront her with the fact that she's being unreasonable, and suggest she talk to a doctor about it.
They do have drugs that can help (no matter what Tom Cruise thinks of them..... oy vey.)

She was a lot like it before, but I can see how menopause would exascerbate the situation. I think I am going to heed your advice, and am gonna go ahead and talk to my family about having an intervention.

[Moonlight Graham]

Originally posted by tigersfan25
Do any of you know of anybody that suffers from a personality disorder. And if you do, how do you deal with it?
Yep, I think the technical term is called in-laws and the remedy is beer. Lots and lots of beer.

[Motor City Sonics]

Try this (http://www.stanford.edu/~corelli/borderline.html)

[djhutch]

Originally posted by tigersfan25
Going through life, I've come across annoying people. Its nothing new to me, nor should it be new to anyone else on this message board.

With that said however, I am beginning to have some doubts about a member of my immediate family (luckily, not my wife) who has always caused trouble for surrounding members of my family. And while she has never been diagnosed, she has almost all the symptoms of a person who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

For example, whenever you disagree with this woman, she take it as an act of war, someone trying to control her life, and proceeds to insult and denigrate you to the point of absurdity.

Do any of you know of anybody that suffers from a personality disorder. And if you do, how do you deal with it?

She sounds like my sister in law. I'm no psychologist, but it sounds like the problem is she's self-absorbed. She thinks the earth revolves around her. People like this cannot carry on a conversation without turning it around to be about them somehow. The problem is, when you confront them about something, you're only empowering them even more.

My wife is the least confrontational person I know, & when she talked with her sister about a concern - we didn't hear from her for 3 years.

[tigersfan25]

Originally posted by djhutch
My wife is the least confrontational person I know, & when she talked with her sister about a concern - we didn't hear from her for 3 years.

Part of the reason I even deal with her to begin with is because of my family. I kinda didn't want her to visit me when she did, but I know that it would upset my mother if I didn't allow her to come out.

But after her last visit with me here in Las Vegas, I can guaruntee you that I will not be facilitating another visit for her UNLESS she is dealt with somehow... and I feel it may be my duty to confront my family with this problem.

[Rooster]

Originally posted by tigersfan25
Going through life, I've come across annoying people. Its nothing new to me, nor should it be new to anyone else on this message board.

With that said however, I am beginning to have some doubts about a member of my immediate family (luckily, not my wife) who has always caused trouble for surrounding members of my family. And while she has never been diagnosed, she has almost all the symptoms of a person who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

For example, whenever you disagree with this woman, she take it as an act of war, someone trying to control her life, and proceeds to insult and denigrate you to the point of absurdity.

Do any of you know of anybody that suffers from a personality disorder. And if you do, how do you deal with it?

This sounds just like a woman at work. She is a flirt one minute and a feminazi with the flip of a switch. Thank goodness she's been on maternity leave the past few weeks to give us all a break, but she definitely needs some professional help.

[KenK]

Sometimes when family members become especially irritating or troublesome, there's really only one solution that will satisfy everybody.

Have them put down.

:classic: